‘Not suitable for children under 3 years of age, due to small parts’
‘Toxic if inhaled’
‘This side up’
‘In the case of emergency, do not attempt to resuscitate’
I can’t actually find the original Sun article for this (at least it’s not online), so it’s possibly a fake. But I’d like to believe it; especially the plan to honour the fireman.
While we’re on the topic of, um… no, this is completely off-topic, but it’s funny (and a wee bit scary), and I might as well put all the funny pictures in one entry. I give you the iScreener*:
The first person to invent such a system (and it’s probably already being worked on) will be a very rich person indeed. A system where you can rate people after chance encounters in a bar, a club, or even in the supermarket. Not only will our forum profiles have karma ratings, not only will we have credit ratings — we’ll have personal star ratings. A divorce will lose you a few points, but donating money to a charity will bump you back up again.
What a scary thought. I wonder what rating I would have, out of 10, all things considered. Who would decide the weightings of each Pro and Con? Google perhaps…
Would you hack the database to elevate your rating to secure the new girlfriend?
We are realistically only a year or two (or less!) away from portable retina scanners. Food for thought…
Maddie
Feb 24, 2009
Um, how much do you need to unhinge your jaw in order to INHALE a kitten? That is sick dude.
sebastian
Feb 24, 2009
It is almost certainly a fake, for that reason
Chele
Feb 24, 2009
WOW, i have no words. swallowed a kitten, how big is his mouth?
sebastian
Feb 24, 2009
Kittens are very small, at least when they are first born!
But it is indeed quite unlikely… but firemen would have quite strong lungs, thinking about it… lots of cardiac exercise, and training for hostile atmosphere…
Best not to think about it too much though…
Sarcastically Bitter
Feb 24, 2009
I wish there were such devices. Could have saved myself some trouble.
Renee
Feb 24, 2009
I could use an iScreener. Though I suppose I can just realize that if I’m attracted to a guy he’s probably not interested. I almost wish I still had some hope…
andhari
Feb 24, 2009
creeepyyy!!
sebastian
Feb 24, 2009
Maybe you need something like the iPlayhardToGet or something then, Renee… Or iEmotionMasker…
But I’ll probably work on the iScreener first…
floreta
Feb 24, 2009
now i have to know if that kitten thing is real!!
love the comic.. digital creepster! now THAT’S how to use technology. hahaha.
sebastian
Feb 24, 2009
Please let me know if you find a source on it… Maybe I can ask my father for permission to go through his Sun archive…
Jossie Posie
Feb 24, 2009
Oh, that article was so sad. Poor little kitten.
sebastian
Feb 24, 2009
The fireman is getting a medal, not the kitten…
Won’t somebody think of the brave men that risk their lives to save us… and our pets?!
Daniel Cassidy
Feb 25, 2009
Have you ever read Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom by Cory Doctorow? It’s a story of the near future, and features a currency called Whuffie, which works pretty much exactly as shown in the cartoon, albeit with a bit of posthumanism thrown in for good measure. Highly plausible, imo.
Incidentally, Abstruse Goose ftw. We have lots of it pinned to the wall at work.
sebastian
Feb 25, 2009
I browsed for a few of the other Goose comics and they were certainly a bit… obtuse.
I’ll see if I can grab a copy of the book — are Whuffies handed between people, with only a finite amount available? Like karma points?
Daniel Cassidy
Feb 26, 2009
You can download the full text from the author’s website here: http://craphound.com/down/download.php
The book’s a bit sketchy on details, but it seems to work something like Google PageRank. Each person can award positive or negative whuffie to each other person they come into contact with (directly or indirectly), with no cap on the overall amount of whuffie awarded. Whuffie is weighted in proportion to the whuffie score of the person who awarded it.
sebastian
Feb 26, 2009
Wow, that’s kind of the author
I have to admit I have problems focusing on a page of static text when it’s backlit though… I’ll try to find a paper copy!