I’ve decided, as Saturday is the day when almost no one surfs the internet that I would dedicate it to whoever happens to be the focus of my beady, male eye. This week, and for the next few weeks no doubt, it will be Eliza Dushku.

If you’re a girl, or you simply have no interest in looking at a cute girl in a very short skirt, you can stop reading now. Alternatively, because let’s face it: you have nothing else to read on Saturday, you could continue!

This week saw Eliza Dushku — Echo — wearing a very short skirt indeed. Any girls that know me (in the Biblical) will know that I love short skirts. I’m not talking sluttishly short, but certainly short enough to get the full effect of those long, silken stilts. Couple that short skirt with some lovely tall, lacy socks and you’re certainly onto a winner (in my bedroom at least).

But no, not content with a short skirt and sexy socks, they threw in a big, red, awesome, phallic bike this week too. ‘It looks like a dragon!’ Eliza exclaims, before mounting — the bike, that is — and racing off to save the day.

I’m aware that socks might be the wrong word, but this is a boy doing the review, not a girl’s magazine. What are they called? Tights? Popsocks? Hoisery? Fishnets? Who cares… just look at those  legs!

Alrighty. That’s my public service for the men of the world done for another week. And girls, if you don’t like being objectified (pfft!), just take this post as ‘How to get that guy, in 2 easy steps: get a short skirt, and a big red bike’, or perhaps just fashion advice: ‘Almost anything goes with a short skirt, because no one’s looking at anything but your legs.’

To the boys: I’m afraid Dushku wasn’t all that hot this week. Even in the opening scene, where she was wearing a rather fine bustier/corset/something juicy, she had incredibly deep-red lipstick which made her look a bit like a courtesan (though, I guess that’s what she ultimately is — a high-value hooker).

To the girls: Tahmoh Penikett, topless. Muscles rippling, and lip quivvering with rage. Don’t say I don’t spoil you.

For those of you that want an episode review: It was OK. Definitely weaker than episode 6 and 7 (which were both great). I assume this one was just building up the mystery, as every episode seems to be doing. Each episode adds a new layer of complexity — I wonder when that will stop, if ever, or if Josh knows he won’t get a second season, so he’s trying to fit it all in before the end…!

This was as pretty as she got throughout the episode. Still fairly hot, I think you’ll agree. But not quite the same as last week.

Now we’re talking. He’s not actually my kind of guy, but apparently some girls like him… Geek girls, I think.

Okay, he has quite a nice back.

I love Saturdays, I can get away with posting crap like this.

A small review to justify this blog post: Episode 9 of Dollhouse. Quite strong. Dushku, somehow, is actually becoming quite a strong actor. Was good to see more of the British girl (shows how much I value journalistic integrity). They finally gave the Australian girl, Dichen Lachman, an almost-mute part to hide her truly atrocious acting. It’s looking more and more like a mini-series, though I guess with the whole ‘The Dollhouse Is Global’ thing, they could stretch it out to another season if it gets continued — it seems unlikely, though.

Anyway, more importantly, here’s Eliza Dushku in some leather one-piece dominatrix outfit. The girls amongst you will be glad to note that her ass is a bit… well… saggy. Though, I imagine the outfit provides very little, if any, support. If anyone thinks they would look more pert in such an outfit, please send proof.

You can tell he quite likes her get-up. Okay, he likes it quite a lot.

She looks awesome from this angle.

‘Hurry up, bitch!’ She doesn’t look so great from this angle, though.

Episode 10 of Dollhouse saw a very interesting ‘mechanic’ examined (one almost identical to Caprica, incidentally, if you’ve seen the leaked pilot): If you can be uploaded into one of the Dolls, can life continue after death? At what level of complexity/accuracy does the the copy become more than just a copy and gain sentience? That’s a complex, existential dilemma which I certainly won’t argue about on a sunny Saturday afternoon, but no doubt a topic being discussed on geekier blogs than mine.

Echo finds herself implanted with the memories/spirit/soul/?? of an older lady so that she can discover who murdered her. Quite an interesting take on the formulaic murder-mystery with the standard twists. Unfortunately, being some 60 year old, Dushku doesn’t wear anything particularly skimpy this week, though she does wear a rather fetching silk negligee thing:

There’s a fantastically uncomfortable bit where the old lady’s son kisses his Echo — his mother, in other words. Though, in a negligee like that, I probably couldn’t fault his logic… ‘Meh, Oedipus knew what he was doing…’

Anyway, because of Dushku’s complete lack of slutty sass this week, you get a couple of topless photos of our intrepid investigator Paul — Tahmoh Penikett. He’s really in way too deep with his current girlfriend — he knows she’s a Doll, and he’s obviously suffering some major turmoil — but that doesn’t stop him from throwing her down on his bed like some kind of beast. Really, watching that scene in slow-motion to get this screencap was quite an experience. The facial expressions he makes… blimey.

And then, of course, he has to take a shower after their wild, animalistic sex.

Just two episodes remaining. Still very dubious about a good ending; will we get a big, juicy, two-parter finale, or just a standard episode? Was it written as a mini-series (expect some explosive fireworks), or will we see some real plot progression (low-key finale)? The son mentions a ‘Dollhouse Manhattan’ in this episode, and unless I’m mistaken the current Dollhouse is in Los Angeles, yet again alluding to something bigger. No doubt yet another ‘international, omnipotent shadowy corporation’ that governs most of the known world, ala Prison Break, Heroes, Fringe… I can’t wait; it’s not an over-used plot device, honest.

I’m going out in a moment, so I didn’t have time to creatively title this entry. Sorry. How about, ‘Dushku and Dichen get it on!’ or ‘Oh, so he’s not actually a stoner?’ (disregard both of those, please, they’re both potential spoilers…)

There’s a word that describes this episode: Finally. Finally, so many bits of the story slot into place. Plot strings are tied off. AND it’s to be continued; all proper TV watchers love a good TBC! The 40-minutes-out-of-an-hour allotment that American TV shows get often causes incredibly cramped plots, shoehorned twists and turns, and forced, ugly character development. When you stretch outside the 40 minute mold and start looking at longer story arcs, things get a lot better (look at the first season of BSG or Heroes for a fine example).

There’s a reason the longer 60-minute episodes of BBC dramas tends to feel more ’rounded’, or why the old-school multi-part Dr Who episodes felt much more developed than the modern, 43-minute variants. Heck, when you tack two episodes together, you’re almost at movie length.

Anyway… I don’t want to spoil the plot because, no doubt, some people haven’t watched episode 11 yet. Two of the following screencaps are safe to look at, but one of them might give a little bit of the story away. I won’t tell you which one. Most importantly, Alan Tudyk makes a cameo appearance as the designer of the Dollhouse (or the technology behind it) — Alan’s the guy that played the cute pilot in Firefly. Actually, looking at a photo of him, he’s not actually that cute…

There was this rather-skimpy red pyjama thing that she wore at the end of the episode, but she looked cuter here, fully dressed…

Dichen can’t really act, but she does look good, strapped down into a chair. I think I speak for most of the male population when I say that a cute, Asian-looking sex slave would tick most of the boxes.

The look of someone very happy to see their long-lost girlfriend OR a psychotic ‘Here’s Johnny!’ maniac? You decide (or watch the episode!)

Hello! This is Eleni of RPG Called Life doing a guest post for Sebastian. The story behind why I am doing this guest blog is long and complicated, but luckily it is the story this post will tell. Given the nature of the story, this post might almost fit in with Seb’s series about geeky guys–something like “How to seduce a geek over the internet”. The geek in question, of course, is our own dear Seb.

One of the TV shows that Seb has made it clear he watches is the new Joss Whedon series Dollhouse. He likes the show, though not nearly as much as he likes its star, Eliza Dushku. You may have noticed a series of “Dushku Day” posts over the past several Saturdays in which he inserts strategic screen shots of her and gushes about how sexy she looks, the words typed out by his drool as it hits the keyboard. But even we girls can see how she’s attractive: beautiful features, lovely brown hair, well-toned body, sexy outfits. And she’s all the more attractive to geeky guys because she’s the star of a sci-fi show. It’s a bit frustrating, really. How is a girl to compete with the likes of Eliza? Most of us can’t really compete with her, but we can use her to our advantage–her, and her socks.

Let’s go back to the March 27 episode of Dollhouse and Sebastian’s post about it the following day. In his post, Seb raved about the socks Echo (Eliza Dushku’s character) was wearing and, more importantly, the way these socks in combination with her cute short skirt showed off her legs.

In the post comments, Seb’s readers debated what these lacy accessories covering Dushku’s legs should be called–tights, pop socks, hosiery, fishnets, over the knee socks, knee-highs, leg-warmers, pantyhose, and stockings were all suggested. Thanks to an Entertainment Weekly column that allows readers to write in and ask where clothing or accessories in a movie or TV show come from, along with a reader named Kelsey who was just as intrigued by Echo’s socks as we were, I found out exactly what these mystery accessories were. They were “snuggly pointelle” over-the-knee socks sold at freepeople.com. Unfortunately, the ivory socks that Dushku wears were out of stock, but the black ones were still available. The conversation between Sebastian and me in the post comments can be summarized as follows:

Me: Hey, I found those socks!
Seb: How about I buy them for you so you can take pictures and then I can ogle at your legs all day!
Me: Um… sure.
Seb: On second thought, I’m too cheap.
Me: Fine, save the money for someone you’ve actually met; I’ll buy them for myself and take pictures.

[Journalistic integrity is something that happens to other people. I'll let the libel go... because of the next photo. -S]

My luxurious, long, soft, shimmery socks arrived in the mail soon thereafter. Now that I had the socks, I had to keep my promise to take some pictures of me wearing them. But what should I wear with the socks for my “photo shoot”? Truth be told, I had neither skirt nor shoes to go with these socks, but these items could be obtained. The question was, what does Seb like (in addition to Eliza Dushku’s legs)? Let’s see… geekery, short skirts, pointe shoes, and the color pink. Using my pointe shoes solved one of my problems, so all I had to do was find a pink miniskirt, and then I was all set.

Prior to my photo shoot, I sent Sebastian a teaser photo with just the socks and the pointe shoes hanging on the back of a chair. Quite innocent, really. He responded–and I quote–”Are yoou tryin’ to seduce me Misses Rawbinson…?” The only proper response was this:

Would you like me to seduce you?

[This was possibly one of the best emails I've ever received. -S]

I think he rather liked that. Whetted his appetite, and it got the ball rolling for me. I had already decided my outfit would include the socks, a pink miniskirt, and pointe shoes. But what poses could I do to display these accessories? What would most get a geek’s attention?

One way to seduce a geek is by playing into his geeky fantasies–in this case, by mimicking Eliza Dushku. In the opening credits of Dollhouse, there are two clips in which Dushku is wearing the (ivory) socks. In one, we see her legs as she walks into a room, dropping her coat on the floor behind her. In the other, we see a close-up of her legs as she rests one foot on a low table and pulls up her sock, and between her legs in the foreground we see her looking out from a mirror in the background. These two photos are my attempt to recreate these clips. The latter was considerably more difficult, since I don’t actually have a mirror and my nascent Photoshop skills can only do so much.

“la la la la la, la la la la la…” (Dollhouse theme song)

[Watching the intro to Dollhouse will never be the same, thanks Eleni. -S]

Another way to get a geek’s attention is to show off your own inner (or not so inner) geek. Here, I model my xkcd shirt (the “I’m not slacking off, my code’s compiling” shirt that’s supposed to raise your programming and swordfighting skills to 18). Because geek girls are awesome, right?

If all else fails to entice your geeky mark, you can always pull something less geeky and more basic…

So there you have it, my crazy geeky photos. Seeing as Sebastian’s birthday is coming up next week, I guess I can call these photos my birthday gift to him. Hope you like them! By the way, Dollhouse’s exciting season finale airs tonight. It’s going to be a good one!

[Best birthday present... ever. -S]

Not one to be put off by Floreta’s epic video realisation of An Ode to Seb, Eleni — the geek I have based a lot of my ‘girl geek’ musings and writings on — has gone one step further.

It arrived in my mailbox about a week ago. My jaw dropped. It was only then that I realised she’d taken it seriously — she’d actually bought some of those ’snuggly pointelle’ socks and really pulled out her pointe ballet shoes… and to top it off, she’d Photoshopped my head onto Dustin Hoffman’s body. For those of you that don’t know, Dustin’s a Jew. A lucky Jew. And now, so am I, thanks to Eleni.

She’s gone and guest blogged the entire creative process in utterly awesome, no-holds-barred geeky style — from the beginning, noticing my lust for Eliza Dushku, through to purchasing the socks, setting up the photoshoot, and finally… redirecting my lust of Eliza to her with a fantastic series of photos. There’s even a pink skirt. And thighs.

She thinly veils her outrageousness with a statement at the end — that it’s for my birthday next week — but I think she enjoyed herself. I think the photos were actually for her. What a geek.

I’ve just watched episode 12 of Dollhouse, the finale — well, the season one finale, let’s keep our fingers crossed that it’s not the finale — and I thought it was a little sad that throughout the main thing on my mind was Eliza Dushku’s cleavage.

Eliza’s not a big girl. She’s short, petite, and certainly not that well endowed in the boob department, but due to the wonders of modern technology — tit-tape and carbon-fibre push-up bras (do they exist yet?) — Dushku’s breasts performed admirably.

The plot itself was OK; it went out with a whimper, rather than a bark, as I expected. Whedon and Dushku both played for a second season which I hope we get (we find out in a week or so). Alan Tudyk was fantastic again as he explored a bunch of identity issues, played out by Echo and Wendy.

That’s Echo and Alpha kissing. Nothing like a bit of old-school symbolism: sparks may fly, eh? The girl behind them is busy being implanted with another personality, with some truly Frankensteinesque lightning providing the atmosphere. Why does everything require lots of sparks and bangs? Haven’t we moved past that yet as a culture?

No half-assed review of the finale would be complete without an honourable mention for Amy Acker who finally lost the nasty scars to play some retrospective ah-so-that’s-what-happened scenes. She’s really rather pretty. Sorry for the gratuitousness — blame Joss Whedon, not me, I’m just the camera man…

You know, I’ve never been fortunate enough to strip a pair of leather pants from a girl? For some reason, none of my girlfriends have been ‘into’ them. Looking at the first photo of Amy’s ass, I have to ask… why not? I would seriously expect the poor guy to be enjoying himself a bit more too. Check out his stare in the second photo, though…

Finally, a few more photos, just to complete this bumper ‘Finale Special’ (don’t ever question my journalistic integrity!) Dichen Lachman, the Witless Wonder (but if you’re reading, Dichen, please, email me — I loved your work in Neighbours), looks absolutely stunning when she quickly seduces Paul — Tahmoh Penikett — who, seemingly, will be playing quite a different role next season.

Goddamnit, just KISS her! Heck, throw her on the floor and screw her brains out. She’s so up for it, Paul… so up for it.

It might look like she needs to pee, but there’s something about that pose which I find quite sexy. Perhaps it’s because you can’t tell if she’s wearing shorts, or a skirt?

This one needs no caption. Needless to say, when you’re elevated like that, crawling across a steel girder, gravity does the rest of the work for you.

I guess that’s the end of Dushku Day, and considering the American TV season is just about over until September, I might struggle to find a pretty little strumpet to feature until then. I’ll see what I can do… and maybe find a few more topless men to tide the girls over too.

Dollhouse had its season 2 premiere last night in the US. If you didn’t watch it… for shame! It was really quite good. Surprisingly so. I assume it was written by Joss Whedon himself, which would probably explain the pithiness — and the sexuality! He sure seems to like sexiness, eh? Amy Acker and Eliza Dushku were both stunning this week.

I don’t know if Dushku has put on a little weight or something but she looked positively glowing last night. Real, lip-biting, she-is-almost-as-pretty-Cheryl-Cole luminescence.

Anyway, as you know, I try to write as little as possible on the weekends, so I will let a whole bunch of captured stills from the episode do the talking instead. Enjoy!

Dushku Day is back, baby!

Warning: Dushku is seriously hot this week. There’s also some Jamie Bamber of Battlestar Galactica fame for the girls to enjoy. I have to admit, he made me swoon a little.

Note: You can click each image to zoom in. If you mouse-over you will see each photo’s comments/notes.

Ah, how we all hoped the second episode would be as good as the season premiere. Alas, it was not to be.

Very odd episode this week. Didn’t really hold my attention. Possibly this was because of the lack of sexy girls — even a breasty Mellie (Miracle Laurie) failed to prod my libido. In fact, this week, the most attractive girl on the show was also the oldest — the lovely, the charming, the English Olivia Williams.

Let’s hope they can capitalise on the very thickly-spread (and possibly very meaty) plot that they’ve sown in the first two episodes of the season.

Discussion topic, for those that have seen the epsiode: Didn’t Topher seem awfully out of character at the start? Are they trying to make him a little more… crazy?

Anyway, a couple o’ screencaps of Eliza Dushku from the start of the episode, and then two of the aforementioned girls. I almost took a shot of Dushku breastfeeding but I thought that would’ve been less sexy and more… er… weird.

Note: You can click each image to make it larger.