Tag: self portrait

I’ve had the same pair of glasses (frames) for about 7 years. I’ve only ever had two pairs of glasses, in fact, but I lost the first pair when I was about 20… and then replaced with them with an identical pair of frames. So I guess you could say that I’ve only ever had one style of eye wear, or something. Anyway, because I now have lots of money, and because I needed to get new lenses, I decided…

I wanted to show you my beard before I hack it all off. I think I’ve talked about my hate for shaving many times, so I’ll spare you the rant again. Basically, I only really look after my beard if I have to leave the house — and that only really happens every couple of weeks at best. Anyway, this is just after showering. Sorry about having such a hugely red/bright ear — the sun really was quite bright (and…

I could talk to you all day about keyboards. My keyboard, in actual fact, may be the single most important object in my life. Is that sad? Every day, I type. For 14 hours or more, each and every day, I type. To say that my keyboard is an umbilical cord would, rather shockingly, be an understatement. This is the portal to my friends, and to the games I play. It is the portal to my office, and without it…

Dear Diary, She didn’t like my cake. She sneered at my cake and slammed the door in my face! Does she know who I am, Diary? Does she know what happened to the last pretty little thing that pushed me away? I’ve decided to take things to the next step without her. I won’t give her another chance to turn me and my presents down. The cat turned up again, Diary. I guess he was hiding somewhere. He looks as…

Dear Diary, That bastard cat! He slipped right out of my hands! Just as I leant down to pick up the knife he dug his claws into my hand and I screamed and dropped him! His claws were so sharp. At least I remembered to shut the shed door this time. He can’t have run far, Diary. I think I’ll take him a bowl of food, lure him out. I just need to remember where I put my gloves… Diary…

Dear Diary, I had a close call this morning. She almost saw me. What a thrill! If she had been just a few inches to the left, if she’d seen me staring, I’d be busy hacking her body to pieces instead of writing to you, Diary. I had to spend quite a while in the shed after that, calming down. I should probably tell you about the brown-haired girl, the one I told you about a few weeks ago. I’ve…