It seems I’m not the only one that keeps a very late schedule, the weird, petite Indonesian does too. I’ve kept ‘American hours’ for a long time now… I think since I played Asheron’s Call (one of the earlier online games, like EverQuest) with a bunch of Americans. Their prime time, 8-10pm, was around 1-3am my time…

It resulted in a few uncomfortable moments where I would be stumbling downstairs around 7am for a snack, and I would bump into my father who was just waking up to go to work. I’ve got it a little more under control now — I go to bed at 4, and wake up at 12. Occasionally I’m forced to get up at a ‘normal’ hour, but I can still operate on 4 hours of sleep.

And now I’m ranting like the girl from out East…

I’ll just give you a few videos which are all totally HILARIOUS, and totally worth watching

Okay, that wasn’t a video. You have to admit it was possibly one of the most funny and disturbing videos you’ve ever seen (if you know who Rolf Harris is anyway…) If you hadn’t quite worked it out, it’s a cover of ‘I Touch Myself‘ by the Divinyls (how come I’ve never heard of them before, but I know the song?)

If that didn’t make you laugh, how about this:

It’s that moment when she hits the ground and you can hear a sound not unlike a coconut being tapped with a hammer. Donk. Sounds a bit hollow…

I promise the ducks, and all sorts of bird-related stuff is coming. After I watch Battlestar Galactica (CAN YOU BELIEVE IT, ABOUT THE THIRTEENTH COLONY?!).

So sorry, I haven’t written anything exciting today because I’ve spent the last 6 hours or so fighting, wrangling and finally head-locking WordPress into displaying some pages just so. It’s hard being a perfectionist; luckily I’m a programmer, or some of the customisations might not’ve been possible!

Anyway, as some kind of apology, I do have two lovely videos from Break for you.

First, a psychopathic just-broken-up girlfriend:

And secondly, because you’re going to want to calm down after that true display of… um… passion (I love how she spares the beautiful TV though after the wild pleading of the on-looker — but a bit of me died inside when she stomped on the laptop…), I have a rather spectacular… jellyfish.

Finally, if this picture below piques your interest, read the article about La Princesse, the 50ft spider.

After 20 years, we finally have a new Simpsons intro! It’s sharper, cleaned up, and… fairly pure! A lot of new stuff has been included, with the only notable exception is the lack of Homer’s girly yelp at the end. The intro does a much better job of introducing the side-characters. The show has been in HDTV for a while, but the intro being two decades old was understandably not HDTV — this new intro is! (so that means the entire show is now being shown in HDTV… rejoice… European pirate TV downloaders! On the topic of piracy, The Pirate Bay’s trial begins next week! Stay tuned, it’s going to be a landmark case.)

While I’m linking videos, I have a failing Tetris player for your joyous consumption (and a Tetris cosplayer, but I imagine he’s being paid a lot to wear the Gameboy outfit… which makes it OK!)

I could’ve chosen any number of gaming videos, but I think about 90% of the Western population has played Tetris, so you should be able to relate to just how stupid this poor kid is.

Then to finish, I have a lovely picture of… the end of a rainbow! Sadly, there wasn’t a pot of gold, but it does look rather spectacular. I’d always been lead to believe it was impossible to photograph the end of a rainbow, due to the way they’re formed… I guess my science teacher was lying ALL THIS TIME! Now I have a weird urge to chase down rainbows…

I’m just sharing this fantastic Pixar short (first seen at the beginning of WALL-E, their latest and greatest animated film).

Watch it, and I guarantee it’ll leave a spring in your step. You’ll find an otherwise dull day suddenly becomes brighter! God knows I need it after being up for the last 24 hours…

Oh, and on the topic of coffee, check this bad boy out. It’s in French, but it has subtitles. Any and all coffee drinkers will appreciate it; I promise!

I finally caved: a video blog is coming.

I have a basic concept — a concept that embraces my complete apathy when it comes to shaving, and expands upon it, hopefully in a funny fashion.

Hopefully the first little bit will be up later today. It’ll be episodic, like the Penis Monologues (which are hilariously now #2 on Google!). There might be a bit of an over-arching story this time around too, so stay tuned!

First, a disclaimer: I know I look pretty damn awful. It’s intentional. I was faced with either shaving and grooming myself… or working with it! Anyway, it’s what’s on the inside that counts, right?

I have a basic idea of where the story’s going, so I’ll try to update fairly regularly. They’ll probably just feature into-the-camera style monologue, but who knows… maybe I’ll start getting creative and exploring ‘the bunker’. Don’t be surprised if the style changes a bit in the first few installments either; I’m fairly new to the video thing, so I have to play with the software a bit and see what works!

Make sure you don’t miss an example of one of my, um, flexible facial expressions towards the end. And don’t give up until you get to the end — it’s short, and it’s worth it! You might also have to turn the volume up!

For those of you expecting something else entirely: sorry for the interruption; programming will resume as normal tomorrow.

I went with the going-slowly-insane route for the plot of Day 37, my new epic video diary/vlog. Who needs sanity anyway? It’s a totally overvalued trait… Right?

As always, it was rehearsed and recorded in about 45 minutes, so don’t expect fantastic production values. If you titter, just once, I’ll be happy. If you grin broadly, laugh out loud, or — dare I say it — gigglesnort, I’ll chalk it up as a massive victory for hairy, yeti-like British men the world over!

Enjoy!

It is with great pride, and with almost no hesitance at all, I give to you the third — and final (for now!) — chapter of Day 37, a story that chronicles the poor plight of a Brit destined to spend all of eternity in a bunker, where no one can hear him fart.

There will be proper pictures of the half-beard to follow, don’t worry!

Well, to put it as simply as I can --
Good and evil are so close as to be chained together in the soul.
Man isn't truly one, but two. Now what if we could break that chain --
separate those two selves --

(his face alight, lost in his subject)

To free the good in man, and let it go on to its higher destiny... to segregate the bad in man --
and let it destroy itself in its own degradation!

Spencer Tracey said it so eloquently in the 1941 film version of Jekyll & Hyde, the story of a brilliant scientist — Dr Jekyll — trying to separate good from evil. While the book itself isn’t considered a ‘classic’ it has created a massive amount of spin-off works — other books, films, TV shows and, most importantly, a musical! The story looks at the duality of the human psyche: good and evil. It actually seems to be very close to the Freudian theory that evil thoughts banished to your unconscious mind impact on your conscious (’good’) mind, ultimately resulting in an the eruption of your very own Mr Hyde.

We should embrace and nurture both our naughty and nice sides, basically, lest we turn into weird and depraved creatures of the night.

Regarding the musical (which many people consider to be overly dramatic and a bit lacking in substance), it’s well worth watching just to marvel at a single actor performing a duet on his own, both as Dr Jekyll and the beast Hyde. Lots of frantic head turning and make-up is required! It’s actually one of my favourite musicals, and I have my first girlfriend at university to thank for introducing me to it (she’s the one I turned gay, for those of you trying to keep up…)

Anyway, that attempt at intelligent discourse brings me neatly onto the topic of the split personality that I developed in Chapter 3 of Day 37, my epic video diary of a poor guy slowly (well, not so slowly it seems…) going insane in a bunker. It occured ot me that you probably couldn’t quite appreciate my good and evil ‘duality’ with the poor quality of my video camera. So, not wanting to disappoint, I prepared this lovely composite showing both my good and evil sides.

Have a nice weekend! I’m off now to go and terrorise some local grocery stores. I’m going to walk in once, only displaying my evil side and ask for booze and cigarettes. Then I’m going to walk in again, this time displaying my scarily-young-and-pretty side, asking the shop attendant with a straight face ‘Have you seen my evil twin brother?’ I’ll let you know of the results…

I know it sounds like a treatise of utmost, contemporary importance, but actually it’s just a recap of a few things that I’ve been up to in the past week, and what’s to come.

If you’re an avid Sebite (OK, perhaps it’s too early to go and deify myself) you’re probably well-aware of the what’s to follow… but it wouldn’t do any harm to read all about what’s hapnin’ (too much Marvin Gaye!) here on my blog.

First of all, I am still running a fantastic competition that everyone should enter. It’s free to enter, you just need to tell me what you’re most passionate about. It can be good, or bad, or ugly — just something that really gets your juices going. The prize is some original art which I will lovingly craft for you, using my awesome photographic skills, which you will be able to use for your blog, or avatar, or… for anything really! If you still didn’t enter, enter now.

Next, and probably most importantly, I made my debut on YouTube. Not one to pander to peer pressure, I decided that if I wanted to video blog with 3 weeks’ worth of facial hair… I damn well would! Forsaking my razor, shampoo and sanity, I filmed 3 chapters of a ground-breaking and revolutionary drama, Day 37. Follow a hairy, cross-dressing Brit as he slowly loses his sanity after falling into a subterranean bunker. If you missed the link, HERE’S ANOTHER (after watching chapter 1, check out 2 and 3… it gets better!) 200 people have watched me lose my sanity and don a leopard-print spandex shirt… don’t you want to see what all the fuss is about?

Penultimately, for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been taking part in a ‘photographic assignment’. This is basically a group of people that all take photos of a concept or phrase. ‘Watery Wednesday’, ‘Funny Friday’ (alliteration is sadly rife in such communities). There’s an awful lot of them, and they vary in quality a lot. Luckily the one I’ve been taking part in , Skywatch Friday is quite good! Not only do they garner bonus points for a distinct lack of alliteration and word play, my huge stocks of landscape photography tend to feature startling skies. I feel quite at home submitting my landscapes to be admired and pored over by discerning viewers (and, importantly, other landscape photographers!)

There have only been a few ‘That’s nice’ replies so far, which is good…!

I’ve also just taken up another, shared challenge: ‘Motoring Monday’ (…) I think it’s just going to be a one-off though, so I’ve created a new category on the blog for Motoring Monday, Skywatch Friday, and any other photographic assignments that I take part in. Feel free to visit it from time to time, if you want to see some pretty photos — they won’t turn up on the front page of the blog, or the normal RSS feed.

Finally, this week I regained my sex drive. Obviously that’s not really news that’ll stop presses, but it could become news, in the not-so-distant future! Hopefully not the ‘turn up on your doorstep 18 years later’ kind of news, either.

Oh, and because I love the picture just a bit too much (the picture, not myself, it’s an important distinction), I’m just going to stick it in again (!) for everyone to enjoy.

I still look like this, for anyone wondering. Walking around town today was interesting: those on the other side of the road all smiled at me; those I bumped into all quickly stepped away and begged Our Lord for protection…